


Double Wedding

by LydiaOLydia



Category: Firefly
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Fluffy Smut, Forced Marriage, I love River, I'm sorry I always write Simon and River out of these, Sharing a Bed, Simon ehhh, Smut, Tropes, smutty fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-15
Updated: 2017-05-15
Packaged: 2018-10-29 23:08:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10864020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LydiaOLydia/pseuds/LydiaOLydia
Summary: This is an older, very tropey fic i wrote for Firefly when I was in a huge Jayne and Kaylee phase.  It starts out fluffy, gets kind of smutty (by my standards).  It was a lot of fun to write and I might not write it the same way now, but I'm still really proud of it.If you like forced marriage or sharing a bed tropes, this is for you.





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mal and Zoe. Kaylee and Jayne. A double wedding. Post Serenity movie. It's not quite what you think. Definitely Kaylee/Jayne. Maybe a hint of some other relationships. Told from many POVs. Not related to my other story "Meant to Be."

The mayor cocked his gun. "I don't think you understand. No woman comes into this town unclaimed. We had some problems with farm hands getting a little too itchy around any piece of skirt that looked available. We don't want any trouble. Now this one -" He paused for a moment and waved his gun in Inara's direction. "has an exemption on account of the fact she's a professional. But you two ladies better speak up right quick and let us know who your men folk are. Then we'll see to your accommodations. Two rooms. One man for each woman."

"What if we don't particularly like that plan?" Mal asked. It'd be interesting to see if the Captain could dance his way out of this one.

" If you don't do as I say, you're not taking another step."

Jayne felt his itchy trigger finger coming on. They couldn't step forward and couldn't step back. The boat was down so they couldn't leave. They wouldn't get parts until tomorrow and they wouldn't get no parts at all if this new relationship didn't go civil. Who the hell had the bright idea to all leave Serenity at once anyways?

Mal glanced at Zoe. They did that head bob thing to show they knew what the other person was thinking. That got damn annoying at times. Lord, Jayne could see how this was going to go. Mal would go all Big Daddy protective on Kaylee and he and Zoe would spend a night with knives at each others' throats. The things he did for a job.

Zoe started walking over to him real slow and casual like. It was clear she didn't relish the prospect of bunking together any more than he did.

Before she got to him, he felt a small hand loop over his bicep. "This here big hunk of man is all mine." Kaylee beamed up at him like he'd hung the moon and the stars. What the hell was that fool girl thinking?

Zoe made a show of walking past them and linking hands with Mal as if that had been her intention all along. Quick thinker that one.

"All right. Men follow me. Brides the other way. We'll fetch the preacher and make this official."

Brides. . .?

###  
Kaylee sighed as she sunk into the big tub of water. "Well at least we all get a nice bath out of all this."

Zoe gave her the Look and she shut up right quick. Truth was, Zoe was the only person on Serenity that sometimes scared Kaylee. She was a woman of powerful strong feelings, but she kept them all inside. Being a widow had just seemed to add to the weight on her shoulders. Kaylee just hoped this plan worked and gave her something to smile about.

"Kaylee, if Jayne tries anything, anything at all, the Captain are I going to be right down the hall." Zoe whispered.

"Shiny. Although maybe you two will be too busy to help me." She winked, but Zoe didn't seem to get the point.

Okay, so maybe she hadn't been thinking too clear when she piped up and claimed Jayne. Things still might work out in the way she hoped. Besides, it was nice to have all these ladies fussing over them and bathing them. One of them was even reading a book.

"We wear white on this day to symbolize the purity and sanctity of the marriage bed." The older woman read out the words in a clear, loud tone.

Kaylee snorted. "Me and Zoe ain't hardly virgins if that's what you mean."

###  
The whole wedding was a blur for Mal. Kaylee couldn't stop giggling and Jayne looked like he'd been poleaxed. Mal wasn't sure what that was about, but he could take a real good guess.

Zoe looked beautiful, but she always did. At the big moment, he gave her a peck on the cheek and she half smiled at him. She was doing her best to look happy for the crowd, but he knew she never had it in her to play pretend. She fed him a bite of date cake and took one in return. Then she smiled for real. He knew she was remembering how much Wash liked dates.

A cheer rose up from the crowd as they were presented as married couples. Fireworks lit the night air. Cymbals roared to life. These townfolk put on quite a party for people that were only staying a few days.

Jayne and Kaylee got carried away on a jiao to a separate tent. He wasn't too keen to have them out of his line of sight, but he supposed Jayne couldn't get up to much trouble surrounded by people. Well, not any different type of trouble than he usually got in.

He turned around to say as much to his lovely bride, but he found that she had slipped away. Good. The woman had earned some peace and quiet. She might even shed some tears tonight. Lord knows she'd want her privacy. He'd known her long enough to understand that.

But there was another familiar face waiting for him. Inara. And she wasn't wearing bridal white. She wasn't wearing much of anything. Not only that, she was smirking. Damn the woman anyways.

"You can't seem to stop getting married every time we stop at a new planet."

"Thought you'd be pretty busy. Lots of lonely men here." He held out his arms and she stepped into them. Best not to hold onto her too tightly. He was a married man.

"I wouldn't miss this for the world. I always dreamed of dancing at your wedding." They swayed to an old familiar rhythm.

"This is serious." He leaned down and whispered the words in her ear. His lips hovered right where her skin looked soft and sensitive.

Inara leaned back a little bit and looked into his eyes. "You're worried about Kaylee. But she's a smarter girl than you think and Jayne wouldn't touch a hair on her head. He couldn't."

"Jayne Cobb is not sly or in any other way incapable around women." Mal shook his head in disbelief. For a companion, the woman wasn't always the brightest about men.

"I didn't say that. I just said he wouldn't touch her. Not the way you're thinking."

"Don't it amount to the same thing?"

Inara sighed. She couldn't explain it to Mal because he could never see what was right in front of him. He never could.

Choosing clients wasn't just about scanning databases and conducting interviews. You learned to gauge a man's temperature about sex, sense his proclivities before he said a word. It became second nature. She had seen how the big mercenary had looked at Kaylee with his eyelids half lowered, an intense look on his face. When no one was watching, he treated the tomboy mechanic like she was a delicate porcelain doll. He'd been like that ever since Simon and River had left one night without a word and it didn't look like it was going to change any time soon.

Touching Kaylee in any way sexual was probably about the one thing Jayne wouldn't let himself do.

###

After the festivities died down, Jayne found Mal stretched out under a tree. It was a wild, green spreading thing, not like the pitiful bushes that dotted the rock he grew up on.

Mal was smoking a cigar and staring down at the bunkhouse. There were only two rooms with lights on and it didn't take a genius to figure out which two rooms those were. Mal lit a second cigar and handed it over without a word.

Jayne took a long drag. This day was unsettling to say the least. He couldn't remember the last time he had a bath. He always thought that was a bit of peculiarity of folks that wanted to spend all their time dirtside. And wearing white like he was some kind of old time hero? Ridiculous.

Mal let out a long stream of smoke. "You so much as touch that girl's wrist and and as soon as this job is over, I will nail your balls up in the canteen. Is that clear?"

"When you going to see that girl is a woman and one with a powerful mind of her own? Hell, she's the one that got us in this."

Mal scratched at his cheek, cigar still clenched between his fingers. "Kaylee thinks life is one big adventure and everyone's good at heart. She's not like Zoe and Inara. One day she'll tire of this life and want to settle down. I'd like her to retire with at least some of her illusions intact."

Jayne had never thought about Kaylee leaving. It made sense. They'd come close enough to that when the gorram doc had been here. He felt a little hitch in his chest at the thought of never seeing Kaylee again. Then the full meaning of Mal's words sank in.

"Think I'd force myself on her if she wasn't willing?" He grabbed a stick and dug it into the ground. It was deep brown dirt, not yellow or red like the dirt he'd seen his whole life on every go se planet.

Mal tapped out some ash. "I don't know. Truly I don't. I've never been sure where the line is with you, Cobb."

"I take whores when I can afford them and willing women when I can't. That's it."

Jayne ground out the cigar and stood up, rubbing the dirt off of him.

"Where are you going?"

"Guess a man ought to spend his wedding night with his wife." He was waiting for Mal to say something, to argue with him. Flat out forbid him from going. Instead the Captain shrugged and took another drag on his cigar.

"You're a grown man. But the minute we hit the Black, these marriages are getting annulled. I wouldn't do anything to endanger that if I were you."

Hell, a man could spend all night sleeping outside if he cared to, but Jayne had never considered himself a coward. Not when it came to women.

Still he couldn't deny it. He hoped that Kaylee would be long asleep before he made it back to bunkhouse. No such luck.

Instead she was sitting up in bed, cross legged with that white dress spread all around her. One big bed. No other place to sleep. No chairs either.

"Thought I'd seen the last of you today. "

"You're just lucky, I guess." He took his guns off and slung his holsters over the bedposts.

"I always figured you for the type that slept with your guns on."

"Not on my wedding night." And he was only here because he was all kinds of stupid.

She gave him a shaky smile. "I never thought I'd get married. Not like this anyways."

"Well damn if this day isn't full of surprises." Jayne grabbed a blanket off the bed and spread it out on the floor.

"I thought maybe me and Simon. . ."

She started to tear up. Damn it, why did women have to cry anyway? He searched the room. They didn't exactly have hankies at hand. He whipped his shirt off, balled it up and tossed it at her. She wiped her eyes on the sleeve.

"He wasn't good enough for you." He didn't look up at her, just got out his knives and started to arrange them. And if some prissy doctor from the Core wasn't good enough for her, what did that say about him? Kaylee was ten times too good for Simon Tam, that meant she was a hundred times too good for him.

"I thought we'd have to spend the night in the same room. I'd never thought we'd have to get married and all. I'm so sorry, Jayne."

"What the blazes were you thinking anyways?"

"Zoe's been so lonely with Wash gone. It's not good for a woman to go too long without a man in her bed. I know that for sure. Thought maybe if the two of them had a night alone, something might happen. I'm not saying it would be anything more than sex, but sometimes that's enough."

Jayne carefully turned away from her so he wasn't staring. The way she was sitting with her legs open, talking sex, was making him crazy. He couldn't see a thing he hadn't seen before, but his imagination was working just fine.

She let out a loud sniff. "I don't know why Captain's so mad about it. I was just thinking of him and Zoe."

"Your plan was about the stupidest in all creation. Zoe's probably crying in her bunk alone. The Captain's sleeping in a tree like a monkey and he's madder than hell because you just stuck yourself with me. All night long. And I am a Big, Bad, Man." He sharpened the knife with every word to emphasize his meaning.

"So?"

"You're not afraid of me?" He turned around.

Laughter bubbled out of her. "Hell no, Jayne."

"You should be." The girl was aggravating. How could she not be afraid of him? He ran his finger along the edge of the blade gave her his best scowl.

She didn't say anything at first. It seemed like she was turning something over in her brain.

"Afraid of you. Why?"

"Girl. I am twice your size. I could flip you on your back and take you ten different ways from Sunday."

"Oh that." She flapped her hand like she was shooing away a fly. "You'd never do that. You might pay for a woman, but you'd never her take her without her say so."

"You seem to be the only one who thinks I'm not capable of it." And why did she see that if no else did?

"Is that what they're all worried about? Whew." She huffed out a sigh of relief. "That's the last thing on my mind."

"Me too. Just want to get some sleep." Good thing he was a gorram good liar.

"I figured we could stay up and you could teach me how to take apart Vera or something, but if you're tired, turn the light out and crawl up. I can keep my hands to myself."

He wasn't sure he could say the same, but he wasn't about to admit it. Instead he shook his head and smoothed his hand over the blanket again. "No, I don't think so. I'm fine here."

Kaylee stretched and yawned with all the satisfaction of a cat. "Suit yourself."

He packed up his knives quietly and blew out the lantern. They laid in the darkness. It was so quiet, he could hear her breathe. Hell, he could hear his own heartbeat.

After a moment, Kaylee spoke in a sleepy satisfied voice. "It might be nice to live like this. Everything's real green. Grow things. Like strawberries. Own some land."

Jayne grunted. "Only thing a man can own is a gun. Even that can get taken away from him if he's not careful."

Kaylee yawned. "Maybe make some babies. This looks like a nice planet for babies."

Now he sure as shit wasn't going to sleep. Kaylee might be spending the night with the baddest hombre in 'verse, but he was the one who was terrified now.

###  
Kaylee had spent her life around men. It was the best way for a girl to learn about engines and darn if you didn't pick up a few other bits of knowledge on the way. She thought she had Jayne figured out, but now she was wondering if she was wrong. Everyone was acting like he had some powerful urge to bed with her, but if he did, she didn't see it. He was disgusting and made jokes some times, but that was just most men's way. She'd learned to pay no mind to that a long time ago. Simon had been different, but then again Simon was a gentleman.

That was one thing Jayne was definitely not. He talked direct about pretty much anything and everything. Of course at the moment he was acting more like her Great Aunt Gert than his usual crude self. If he had wanted sexing, wouldn't he just flat out say so? She wasn't shy when she was feeling needful, why would he be?

She stared down at the mass of manhood sleeping on the floor. Things with Simon had been sweet, but not real interesting after a spell. She had a feeling that things with Jayne would be a mite different. Come to think of it, it had been an awful long time since a man had been in her own bed. She had no moral objections to taking care of business herself, but there was something about a man's arms wrapped around you that felt nice.

Jayne had big arms. Right now he smelled good too, which was a rarity for him. He wasn't wearing a shirt and if she reached out she could just graze her fingers along his chest. . .

###

The woman was going to be the death of him. He didn't even need to open his eyes to feel her looking at him.

"Quit staring at me and go to sleep."

"Why?"

"Why what?" He gave up and opened his eyes. Not like he was going to sleep with her jabbering on.

"Why is everybody so sure that something is going to happen between me and you?'

"Because you're a woman and I'm a man. Ain't that enough?"

"We've known each other for long time now."

"Years." Two years, three months and five days.

"Wouldn't it have happened if it was going to happen?"

"Maybe so." He desperately wished he had another cigar, hooch, someone to punch, anything to get his mind off his conversation and the woman he was having it with.

Truth be told, he'd been working out how to get into Kaylee's overalls when Mr. Fancy Doc had shown up. He wasn't above stealing another man's woman, but then she had seemed so gone on him. What was the point? How was he going to compete with a pretty boy from Osiris who could give her all the things he couldn't?

"Jayne?"

"Gorram, woman. What is it now?"

"Did you think I looked pretty today, in a dress and all?" She sounded nervous.

He knew jack all about women, but something pinged inside of him and told him this was important. He propped himself up on one arm. His eyes had adjusted to the dark now and he could see she was lying on her side, her face tilted towards him.

He could still remember the moment of her walking toward him, the evening sunlight shifting through her hair and the breeze stirring at her long dress. She had worn a giddy smile as if this whole thing was a joke that only the two of them understood. He'd been afraid to kiss her, really kiss her in the moment, so he settled for a peck on the lips. She felt soft and warm and tasted like dates. He knew he'd never forget it in a million years. But he couldn't possibly get all the right words in the right order, so he just settled for the simplest truest thing.

"Ai Ren, you looked so beautiful it hurt."

There was a loud thump as she slid down onto the floor beside him.

"What the hell you doing, Mei Mei?"

"Mei Mei? Just a minute ago you were calling me your lover." She pressed a quick kiss on his lips. Nimble little fingers started working at his belt buckle.

"Well, I wasn't quite in my right mind at that moment." He tried to wrestle her hands away from him, but she was slippery and quick and he wasn't trying to fight her nearly as hard as he should. Her breasts were pressed up high and tight against his chest and he bit down a groan.

"You feel all right to me." She'd worked the belt buckle free.

In about five seconds, there weren't no way he was going to convince her that he wasn't interested in her in every meaning of the word.

"Kaylee, stop." He grabbed her wrists. "Before we do something we can't fix."

"Don't worry. I'll fix it. I'm good with my hands."

El Fin/The End Maybe?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter has the ahem, "mature content." Feel free to stop here if that's not your thing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, everyone this part is definitely M rated. Feel free to turn back if that is not your style.
> 
> Special thanks go out to my in real life friend Lynn, who held my hand and took the time to beta this. Any mistakes that remain are my error and not hers.

She straddled him like she'd won a wrestling match. But he was in control here. He was bigger. Stronger. All he had to do was plop her in bed, pull the sheet up to her chin, peck her on the cheek and tell her she was like a little sister to him.

"You can't tell me you don't want this because I've got the evidence right here." She broke one hand free. Ran it down the length of him, firm and possessive. The girl was not shy, he could say that much for certain.

He was fixing to come up with a real first-class argument, but then she kissed him again. A long slow sweet kiss, the likes of which he had not had since he was a much younger and better man. Then she started wiggling again. Making moaning noises into his mouth.

That was it. Any hope of fighting this was over. He'd heard it said God would provide for the scoundrels and and the fools as well as the innocent lambs. If the Lord had seen fit to reward him tonight for something he had done in this mother-humping life, he was going to make the best of it.

He grabbed her by the hips and pulled her closer, but her skirt tangled up. It was too damn long. He'd never get at any good girl parts from this angle.

"It's been a while. Would you mind flinging my skirts up and getting to it?" She pressed a light kiss on his neck.

"We paying by the hour here?" He managed to get out the words, barely.

She pulled away. "No."

"Then no." He sat up and tried to undo her dress. Couldn't find anything. What the hell was keeping this thing together?

Kaylee giggled. She was tiny, but every inch of her was ripe and soft and bounced up against him. He almost lost it right there as if he was a rutting teenager. This was the not the Jayne, Master of Love, moment he'd been hoping for. Enough of this tussling on the ground go se.

He lifted her to the bed. They looked each other in the eye, both breathing hard.

"Something wrong with the floor?" She asked.

"I'm dead tomorrow. Plan on spending my last night in a real bed." He shucked off his pants and crawled in beside her.

Her arms twisted to work the dress off. He grabbed at those quick hands and put them in her lap.

"No." Just the one word, soft and low.

"It''ll be faster if I do it." She said.

"Thought about this too many gorram times to be rushed now."

"Really?" She looked at him, sparkle in her eyes.

Shit. Hadn't meant to say it out loud.

"Maybe." He brushed her hair so it went over one shoulder. His hand lingered. She trembled a bit. That was gratifying at least.

"How many times?" She sounded too satisfied for her own good now.

"Just turn around and let me get on with this." He said.

She faced forward and sat up a little bit taller, like he'd given her some kind of great compliment.

He stroked along her spine, up and down the dress. No buttons or snaps. A million ribbons laced up her back, tiny pieces of Kaylee skin poking through. Untying this mess alone would take half the night. He groaned, rested his head against her bare shoulder for a moment. Nibbled. She tasted like honey there. Probably tasted good everywhere.

"Don't you want to get out a knife and cut me out of it? I'm not going to wear it again." She said.

"Nope." Didn't need a knife. It was a little silky thing, he could rip it off with his bare hands if he had to. But he didn't have to.

He untied the bow. Ran the ribbons through his fingers for a moment. Unfastened the first lacing. There was a deep X mark where the ribbon had been too tight. He reached out to brush a finger against her skin and stopped.

He HAD thought about this. But in his head it had always been in the engine room. They would both be covered in dirt and grime and start groping each other after one too many to drink.

But he'd never imagined it like this, a warm bed and her skin looking so clean and soft he was afraid to touch her.

What the hell was he doing here?

#####

The man was going to be the death of her. Things had been running hot and fast, but now he was sitting there staring at her gorram back of all things. If she didn't know him better, she'd swear he'd never been with a woman before.

"Jayne, are we holding a revival meeting or is there going to be some rutting going on tonight?"

He mumbled something about irritating women, but it must have done the trick because he started touching her again.

He traced over the grooves in her skin. She let out a hiss of pain and pleasure mixed together.

"Hurt you any?" He said.

"Stings a bit, but mmm." She let her words trail off.

Then she felt it, a rasp as he scraped his whiskers along where the ribbons had been.

"Jayne." Now his name came out as a sigh.

Kiss, lick, scratch. Kiss, rub, scrape. Each time he unwound a bit of the lacing, he gave attention to her flesh. As if he could wear the marks away. Her dress slipped down off her breasts, but he didn't stop.

She couldn't deny he had some talent. Got so the tiniest whisper of his breath made her want to scream.

But they'd never get down to business at this rate.

She bumped backwards until her pi gu was wedged right between his thighs. She could feel him solid and tense even through all the layers of filmy, floaty stuff. Everything back there seemed pretty promising. She tried to spin around. He let out a growl and nipped at her neck.

"Come on then, I like it from behind. Makes me feel like an animal. Wild."

There was a choked sound from somewhere deep in his throat. "Well ain't that something to stow away for a rainy day."

From behind also made her feel safe. A big man wrapped all around your back made you feel like nothing would ever hurt you again.

She brushed up against him again, more insistent. Grabbed his big calloused palm and put it on her breast. That was usually a sure way to get a man's attention. Wasn't too bad from her end either.

"How 'bout it?"

He flicked his thumb over her nipple till it peaked, and then drew his hand away. "Not this round." Pushed her forward and kept working.

"This round? Pretty confident in yourself."

"Yep." He sounded so matter of fact and cool. How come she was getting revved up by her lonesome?

"I ain't one to beg for it." She wanted to get that straight right now.

"We'll see." There it was, the usual swagger in his voice.

Time seemed to spin out to an eternity. She didn't move, didn't say anything. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction. The world narrowed down till everything was his hands and his lips and his tongue and her breath.

She'd grab tight onto her skirt, clench down to keep herself from letting out the tiniest sound.

Finally the last bit of fabric fell away. The top of the dress pooled to her waist. A cool rush of air hit her and she shivered.

She twirled to face him, draped her legs sideways across his lap. Gave him the full sweet Kaylee smile. It had a certain affect on men and she wasn't unaware of it.

Jayne swore so loudly and fluently in honest admiration that it made her blush.

"Them's fine words Jayne Cobb, but I want some action."

She lifted up her hips. The fabric was all twisted, but he slid it off.

She was laying half on him, naked as jaybird. He was the same. She'd been on his lap on the floor before, but they'd had layers of clothing between them. Now it was skin to skin. He was as hard and fire hot and ai ya, as big, as she hoped he'd be. Something fluttered in the pit of her stomach.

This was Jayne. They were fooling around. It didn't have to mean anything.

But he wasn't at all what she expected. She thought it would be all to be grabby and quick. Instead he sat there and stared.

He ran one rough finger over her face as if he was trying to memorize every bump and line. Then he trailed it down to her collarbone.

Not this again. She was about to pop and he'd tease her till doomsday. Didn't want to beg, but all women had a limit. She took his hand, dragged it real slow over her body, then cupped it over her sex.

"The business end's down here."

He chuckled and gave her a wicked feral look. That was the real Jayne again. Macho, arrogant and aggravating.

She was flat on her back in less than a minute and he was all over her. All broad, strong muscles and rough, scratchy skin. And it felt good.

He balanced on his arms so he wasn't crushing her. For a minute, their eyes locked. Then he slammed inside of her with one quick, rough push. She gasped and clenched her legs around him.

"Don't move." He whispered into the side of her face.

"What if I want to?" She rolled up to him and squeezed every muscle tight to show she meant business.

He moaned. "Didn't you have to promise to obey me?"

"I don't recall that." She laughed, but then he kissed her on the neck until she went breathy instead.

He kept at it until all she could do was whimper. She couldn't talk, but he seemed to understand fine. Started to move in and out.

Kaylee understood all about friction, the way parts have to fit and move together to make heat. Heat was energy and energy is what kept you flying. She knew it down to her bones. It was a natural part of being a mechanic.

But this was beyond anything she'd learned. He filled and stretched and surrounded her. This part was as rough and fierce as she had hoped. Jayne had gone from full quiet to whispering her name and dirty words and curses all in a long stream that didn't make any sense. His breath tickled at her ear, her neck, and into her hair. It got hotter and faster until she had to let go.

Then for a split second, she was an electric arc sparking, blazing over a dark night sky.

Jayne came a moment later. He flattened out on top of her, boneless. Mercy, the man weighed a ton.

There was a muffled sigh from somewhere deep in the pillow.

She ran a fingernail up and down his arm. "Your turn to beg now."

####

Mal wasn't sure if this was his smartest idea or his stupidest, but wasn't life about taking chances? Dawn was almost peeking over the hills, so it was now or never.

There was a sleepy mumble when he opened the door and then the sound of a gun cocking.

"Zoe, it's me. Kindly disengage your sidearm."

"Don't particularly feel like company, Sir."

"I know but you're getting it anyways." The bed creaked when he sat down. If he made a fuss over her, she'd bridle at him. He'd have to go at this sideways.

"Remember the first night at Tien Canyon?"

"Lost a lot of good men that day." She said.

"First time I ever saw a man die right in front of me." He stared at his hands, the memory coming back.

"I'm not really sure where you're going with this, Sir."

"I was bawling so hard you crawled into my tent. Told me I'd wake the camp and alert the enemy of our position."

"You were making a bit of a fuss." She said.

"Corporal Alleyne telling me not to be such a sissy mama's boy. I'll never forget it."

Both of them got real quiet. He knew she was remembering. They'd made love that night. Never talked about it again Never did it again. Some things just happened.

"You never told Wash, did you?"

"No need to. Was a fair bit in the past and wanting to sex you was no great threat to my marriage."

That stung a bit. "Now, don't hold back on my account. Let me know how you really feel."

"Never tried to spare your feelings before, not going to do it now." That was Zoe.

"You know, I'm not all bad. Women have been known to compliment my manliness on occasion."

"Definitely not looking for THAT kind of company. Sir." The Sir was very pointed and annoyed.

"I ain't here for that. I'm here as your captain. You haven't let yourself shed a single tear for him, have you?"

"Maybe I have." The defeat in her voice belied the words.

"Zoe Wasbourne, I've known you long enough to see when something is eating away inside of you. What I'm trying to say here is, sometimes after the heat of battle, you've got to lay down your guns and give yourself time to grieve. No one in this room is going to think less of you."

He heard a sigh.

There was a rustle of sheets. She crawled into his lap and put her head on his shoulder. He held her and rocked her like a baby till all the tears were gone.

####

It had been a good mission, all told. They'd got the parts Kaylee had been hankering for and some bits and bobs to trade. After an early morning trip to the courthouse, he held two sets of divorce papers folded up in his pocket. He was ready to break them open the moment they kicked up dust.

Wouldn't be long now. Inara was already waiting back in the shuttle. Zoe walked beside him. He could tell she was a bit easier and unstrained today.

The other newlyweds walked ahead of them, which was quite a sight to see. Kaylee was skipping double quick to keep up with Jayne's stride. She didn't seem to notice Jayne was walking slower to make it easier on her. He made a big show of grumbling about being a draft horse, but he carried the parts easily as well as Kaylee's little pack.

Mal patted at the papers in his pocket one more time, reassuring himself they were still there. He'd be able look back and laugh about this in the not so distant future, fates willing.

"Kaylee seem happy to you, Sir?" Zoe said.

"Kaylee's always happy. It's a curse."

"But doesn't she seem especially happy this morning?" Zoe put a hand on his arm, stopped him in his tracks. They both took a minute to really look.

He couldn't deny Kaylee had a certain glow about her that was remarkable even in someone who was eternally cheerful. Come to think of it, Jayne was smiling too and he hadn't gotten paid today. Two things gave Jayne a shit-eating grin. One was coin the other was –

His bile rose just thinking about it.

"You don't think they -" He couldn't say the words.

"I do believe they did." She said.

"After I told him not to?"

"Wouldn't be the first time he's ignored a direct order."

"I'm going to knock their heads together." He clenched a fist. Hard. "Then I'm going to knock Jayne around more."

"Why don't I talk to Kaylee, Sir." Zoe said.

"You certain?"

" I think I could use a girl talk. Make for a change."

"I'll take Jayne." He said.

She frowned. Shook her head. "Hold off a bit. Let me talk to her first. I think you might be underestimating him."

He didn't think you could be in danger of underestimating Jayne. It would be like underestimating an amoeba. Then again there was a first time for everything.

###

Zoe found Kaylee in the engine room. Made sense. It wasn't just where she worked. It was where she went to be by herself and think. Everyone needed that. Zoe used to have her bunk, but now it just brought up too many painful memories.

"These papers are from the Captain. You and Jayne have to sign them. We send them back, get it notarized. Then it will all be squared away."

Kaylee held up her hands. They were covered with grease from the engine. Zoe ambled over and tucked the papers in the girl's overall pocket.

"That's it? Then it's done?" Kaylee said.

"Except for one thing." Zoe stepped back so they were eye to eye again. "I'd like an explanation. What were you thinking, Mei Mei?"

Kaylee bit her lip. "Thought maybe you and the Captain with a night alone, might find some comfort in each other. You know, some good sexing to clear the cobwebs away."

Sex as comfort? If only life were that simple. She wasn't sure she could explain this to someone who was still so young and innocent in so many ways.

"The Captain and me, we're hard. We've seen too much. Done too much. Two of our kind get together? Precious little comfort to each other. Too much to carry."

"So, nothing? But didn't you ever wonder?" Kaylee asked.

"Don't need to. That boat left the dock a long time ago."

"Oh." Kaylee's eyes widened, taking it in. "Oh." she said again.

"But I'm thinking that might not be true of everybody last night." She was trying to ask, not judge. She hoped Kaylee understood the difference.

"What? Me and Jayne? No way. We stayed up all night and played Tall Card." The girl glowed bright red. Made herself busy fiddling with an electrical box.

Zoe wasn't mechanical, but she knew screws didn't come loose with a hammer. Plus she was reasonably certain you couldn't play Tall Card with two people.

Zoe thought about the one night with Mal so many years ago. It hadn't been what you would call good, in most meanings of the term. She didn't want it repeated, but she wouldn't take it back for anything. They knew where they stood on the battlefield and off. Maybe things between Kaylee and Jayne were the same.

"You know sometimes things happen in the heat of a moment. They don't have to mean anything. You get my drift?" She didn't want to spell things out any further.

"Despite the fact everyone thinks I'm a child, I'm plenty familiar with sexing, casual and otherwise. Not three times in one night though." Kaylee said this last part under her breath.

Three times, oo-ee, maybe they were all underestimating Jayne.

Kaylee seemed to realize she was holding the wrong tool, switched it to her other hand, but didn't set it down. Made a big show of checking some wires. "So, you and Captain. It cleared the air between you? Settled things?"

"Yup. I don't think it crossed either one of our minds afterward." Zoe said.

Kaylee didn't look entirely thrilled by the idea. Matter of fact, she looked like a kicked puppy. She gave a wire a particularly vicious twist.

Kaylee wasn't in - With Jayne? No, not Jayne? Surely not.

She was way out of her depth. Should just steal away and get Inara. A Companion could talk about sex and love and which was which. But Zoe knew she was the only one who could tell Kaylee this.

"You know, when Wash asked me if we could be a regular thing, I laughed and threw him out of bed."

"Yeah?"

"The man always did like making me laugh. I figured it was a another joke." Zoe felt herself smile a bit. It was nice to think about Wash and smile for a change.

"And then?" The hammer drifted down to Kaylee's side. She was starting to get caught up in the story.

"He asked again and I almost punched him, but I didn't want to ruin that pretty face. I couldn't make him see sense. We lived a life where we didn't know what we'd be doing one day to the next. If we'd be alive. Having a man in my bunk on occasion was one thing, but in a steady way seemed like a mistake."

"But he convinced you." Kaylee beamed. The girl was a born romantic.

"Yeah. He convinced me. He was stubborn and tough in his own way. Just kept bringing it up."

Kaylee scrunched her nose, but didn't say anything.

"You know, if I could do it all again? I'd say yes right off. It was all too short." Zoe said.

Kaylee laid down the hammer. Looked her square in the face again. "You trying to say me and Jayne could be a regular thing?"

"I'm saying if he asks, don't laugh. You might be surprised."

####

Mal was grateful he was piloting Serenity. Better to focus on that than the nonsense going on. One of Serenity's sensors let out a tinny chirp, reminded him he was neglecting her. He fiddled with it, then patted her down.

Being captain and pilot was too much for him, but he hadn't found a soul he could trust with his girl. Not yet.

"Sir?" Zoe had a way of slipping into a room like a jungle cat. Thankfully he was used to it.

She handed over their divorce papers and a pen. She had already signed and he put his flourish next to hers. Just needed to send it back and get it stamped with a chop to make it official.

"How'd your interrogation go?" He said.

"Interesting. Kaylee had some crazy notion that if she threw us together for a night, something would happen." She didn't elaborate, but her look made the meaning clear.

"I don't know where the girl gets these ideas."

"She's young. We were all young once." Zoe said.

"Well, we're about to break atmo. Can I throw Jayne out the airlock or not?"

"I would stand down. Let them work it out themselves."

"We talking the kind of work it out themselves where I lock myself in the cabin for a week, drink Hg Kay Py brandy with cotton balls in my ears and we never speak of it again?" He said.

"Permission to speak freely, Sir?" Zoe said.

"Don't get all stiff bottomed on me now. Just spit it out."

"I think this might be more than an occasional thing between the two of them." She said. Looked away as if she was almost embarrassed to admit it.

He must have misheard her. "Jayne and Kaylee? Ape man and the original sunshine child?" He said this real slow and clear. Zoe was his second in command and he wanted to make sure she wasn't getting soft in the head.

She nodded. "I'm getting a distinct feeling from Kaylee."

"It's got to be some kind of mistake."

"If they're making a mistake, it's the kind you can't stop people from making." She said.

"Like you and Wash?" He said.

"Like me and Wash. Maybe." She shrugged. "Too soon to tell for certain."

"I don't like it. Not on my boat." He said.

"Not really your say, Sir."

He hated when things didn't go his way. What was the point of a crew if they didn't mind orders? He tapped at a lever on Serenity. At least she always listened to him.

"I suppose you're next? Going to find some fine specimen of manhood and drag him into our way of life?" He looked at her from under his brows. He hadn't thought of Zoe being lonely for a man, not really. But marriage had seemed to agree with her.

"Wash was one of a kind. I don't see his like coming again." There was the sadness behind her eyes again. He supposed it would be a while before all the ache eased away.

"Well, you are an ugly creature with the spirit of a mule. Reckon you'll end up in the old folks home with me and we'll talk about our glory days. Bore those poor nurses to death." He said.

"There'd be worse things."

Most people who lived their lives never made it to the inside of an old folks home. They both knew it.

"Serenity's on auto for the moment. Let's grab some protein and try to forget about these crazy children and their hormones." He said.

"Mind if I sit here for a moment? Alone." She ran her hand up and down the console.

"Of course not." He freed up the captain's seat for her.

"Mal?"

He paused, one hand on the doorway, turned around. Couldn't remember when she'd said last said his name.

"Yes?"

"Maybe some day, a long ways from now, there could be somebody else." She said.

Mal knew he shouldn't smile because captains weren't supposed to smile. But his mouth turned up, maybe just a bit. "Well, that somebody is going to be a lucky son of a bitch."

####

Kaylee wasn't sure what game Jayne was playing. He'd been avoiding her ever since they left atmo. She was going to get this done and she'd come to his cabin if she had to.

She dropped down the ladder. She figured he would be fidgeting with guns or knives, but he was sprawled across his bunk. Almost as if he was waiting.

No naked girl or bad words on his T-shirt today either. That was almost dressing up for him. It wasn't so much the shirt attracting her attention as what was underneath. She thought she was used to Jayne's muscles, but they were having a new affect on her now she'd felt them up close and personal.

She'd rolled the divorce papers up in her hands. Unrolled them. Whole room seemed smaller than she remembered. Not that she'd been inside more than once or twice before.

He looked up. Didn't say a word.

"Time to get this thing ended." She held out the papers.

He didn't take them.

"Just one problem and you know what it is." He ran his finger along the edge of his bunk. Raised an eyebrow.

He could not be serious.

"We can lie. No one but you and me knows." She crossed her fingers behind her back. She never flat out admitted the truth to Zoe.

"I don't know. It don't sit right with me." Jayne Cobb, the 'Verse's leading moral authority.

"You've been lying since the day you was born and now you're telling me you're NOT going to lie about a little sexing?"

"I have never lied once in my life about sexing. Not even about Greenleaf." He said.

"Jayne, for the last time, those girls were not triplets."

"Was too." He huffed his breath.

"They didn't look alike. Cousins at best." She said.

"Was too triplets." But she hadn't offended him.

"I think I know what this is about." She put her hands on her hips, papers still rolled in her hand.

"You do, huh?"

"You know Mama was a Lomack and Mama always said once a man was with a Lomack woman he doesn't go back."

"Awful high opinion of yourself." Jayne studied his fingernails. "How do I know you're the one who ain't had your fill?"

Kaylee licked her lips. "Maybe we should do this one more time. Just to be certain." She knew there was a reason she wore the lacy unders today.

He leaned back farther, folded his arms. "Only because you're so insistent. I'll show you you're the one who can't get enough of me. Can do it in less than four minutes too."

"I can do it in three."

About three and a half minutes later, the papers fluttered to the floor, forgotten.

El Fin/The End


End file.
